Everybody Makes Mistakes: What a Difficult Wedding Period Taught Me as a Celebrant

Queue Hilary Duff

Sometimes things go wrong as a celebrant and that is perfectly okay. Having started back at my day job after the school holidays, I have been riding on the highs and lows of the six ceremonies I did over the summer break. Essentially a ceremony a week, though it may not sound too much to more seasoned celebrants, was a lot for me as a part-time teacher, part-time celebrant and full-time mum. On the days of ceremonies, I was rushing out of my house after changing my dress last minute due to a snotty shoulder. On the days I would do my admin work, I had a very solid toddler on my lap, watching Ms Rachel on one screen while I did the legal bits both on the other screen and on paper. It felt quite chaotic. But I did it and it was great.

Yes, as I alluded to earlier, there were booboos. One of my beautiful couples informed me after receiving their marriage certificate in the mail that I had not made just one error, but three on their marriage certificates! THREE!

This was literally one of my biggest fears and the biggest sloth that prevented me from starting my celebrant journey. What if I make an error on the paperwork? Well… I didn’t just make one… but yes, three.

I was so sure that this was not possible and that I copied all the information correctly from the Notice of Intended Marriage (NOIM). I casually messaged my client and to paraphrase, I said: 

“lols but I copied the info from the noim???”

So I checked the NOIM, the Official Marriage Certificate and the Declaration of No Legal Impediment and there it was very clear. My self-diagnosed computer blindedness struck again! No! It was not the same! Everything on paper was correct but everything I had typed up on LifeLink was incorrect!

An added vowel? An omitted consonant? An incorrect surname? Yup. That was all on me. 

Had I checked carefully on LifeLink? I thought yes. But very obviously I did not. 

So how did I amend this? After profusely apologising to my unreasonably understanding and wonderful client and crying into my pillow at night, I Googled it. But because I am impatient and think I’m best buddies with the BDM and sent them directly an email. My email simply read:

Hi,

My couple have just notified me that after having received their marriage certificate in the mail that there are some spelling errors.

Having reviewed them, I see that I made some mistakes when entering their information on LifeLink but not on their written paperwork such as their Official Marriage Certificate or NOIM.

How am I able to amend these errors?

Kind regards,

Angela

They very kindly replied, ten minutes later:

Dear Celebrant

As the online registration has been completed and certificate issued (and received by the couple), you must follow the Marriage Celebrant Correct an Entry process.

All Corrections are processed by the Amendments Team.  

Please complete a Marriage Celebrant Correct an Entry form, and submit it direct to the Amendments Team for processing.

The details on this Marriage Celebrant specific Correct an Entry process and how it works is listed below:

Please refer to our Marriage Celebrants webpage (https://www.nsw.gov.au/departments-and-agencies/births-deaths-marriages/business-partners/marriage-celebrants) for details of the process for Celebrants to follow in requesting corrections to a registration.

You can find these details in the Common Questions section. 

The ‘How do I correct the an error after submitting the marriage registration’ question outlines the requirement and process.  It also provides a link to the required Correction form.

For this specific Marriage Celebrants process, a New Correct an Entry form has been developed for Celebrants to use. 

The Form explains the process and where you lodge the completed form.

The key points being:

• A Celebrant is only authorised to request a correction for a Two Month period after Registration

• A Celebrant must complete the ‘Correct an entry – marriage celebrant’ form.

• The Correction request is submitted direct to the Amendments Team at bdmamendments@customerservice.nsw.gov.au

• Celebrant is not required to provide Proof of Identity documents

• The Certificate with errors does not need to be returned – Celebrant must destroy the old certificate and sign the declaration in the Correct an Entry form.

This process will assist in improving and streamlining the correction process for Celebrants.

Our Team is unable to monitor and provide updates on the progress of any correction application.   Please check the website for the expected processing times and contact the Amendments Team direct for updates.

Like omg thank you for being so prompt and yes I am on it right now. Because all the correspondence with the BDM has been so prompt and my marriages were getting registered literally an hour later, I thought that this process would be really prompt too. 

But, it has taken over a month. But it is okay. It is my fault, I should have been more thorough.

If you are familiar with my blogs, you know that I am about to digress to illustrate my point. 

In 2018, I travelled with a group of peers from my day job as a teacher to Mexico and Panama as a pilgrim for World Youth Day. It was an absolutely amazing experience, but an experience I almost did not experience. Why? Computer blindness.

When I was applying for my Visa to enter the United States of America, I entered my details incorrect 🙃 It should have been picked up at Sydney airport, with the people at the front desk unable to find a detail but letting me through anyway as we were a group of 40. 

What happened after entering LAX? Well… I was detained by Homeland Security as I did not have my Visa. This also happened during the time of the government shutdown. There was a very real chance that I was about to be deported back to Australia.

 But the lovely officers helped smooth the process by making phone calls and I am so grateful as I was able to experience one of those landmark events in a person’s life that changes them entirely. 

Anyway, back to my present day life. Yes, there were booboos, mistakes but also not really?

Since returning back to my day job, I have taken it easy with taking on new clients. However, I had 2 enquiries from 2 beautiful couples and I was in the process of setting up initial meeting dates but I was unable to successfully book them. 

I am never disheartened by the couples I am unable to book. I am a true believer in things happening for a reason. 

The first beautiful couple that I did not have the pleasure of booking? I had spoken to them the week prior and they tried to call me urgently on a Monday morning whilst I was at a staff meeting. Unable to answer, I let them know that I would be able to phone them at the end of my work day.

Sadly, in that time, the bride’s mother became very seriously ill and they proceeded with a celebrant they were able to contact that morning. There are absolutely no hard feelings about that.

The other couple, well that information is a bit more sensitive and I am not willing to oblige that information. But with their faith being important to them and their church wedding booked for next year, they were able to get a priest to marry them. Although I was unable to conduct their civil ceremony for them, they wanted to pay me to which I declined. 

So yes, mistakes have been made but they have taught me that it is no big deal and mistakes can be fixed. Yes, couples were not booked but I am happy as long as it works out for them.

Weddings should be fully about the couple, what works for them and their circumstances. I am still grateful to have met these lovely people and hear a little about their love stories and family stories. I will still keep them in my thoughts and wish them all the best.